The Cavalier in Austin is one of those weird Austin bars that wants to be a dive bar, but is just a little too nice to really be a dive bar. It sits right across the street from a real dive, The Lost Well (with the slogan: “the nicest bar you’re too scared to walk into”), just to fully highlight the juxtaposition of its own aspirations. The Cavalier Burger has the same pitfall, except maybe in reverse. It wants to ignore its dive bar label, and be something more elevated. Something fancier than it’s surroundings would suggest. It comes with your standard American cheese, LTO, pickles, and “house” mayo on a brioche bun. Don’t be fooled by the “house” label, the mayo is just mayo. If they’re making it from scratch to call it “house,” I’m sure there’s a disgruntled kitchen employee somewhere in the back blending eggs and slowly drizzling oil into them with a chip on their shoulder.
The burger itself is weirdly homogeneous. There’s not a lot of distinct flavors in there, and the texture is like biting into some weird, burger-flavored jello. Your teeth could pass through the stack of ingredients unencumbered, save for the, admittedly, delightfully crispy edge of the toasted bun. But the aforementioned “house” mayo is slathered on so thick as to soften the bun sufficiently, if you take more than three minutes to eat it. The same could be said for the buttered top, which just leaves you feeling slimy and a little gross every time you pick the burger up for a bite. Mrs. Burger Boy summed it up quite concisely:
“It was not good. It was bad. Every aspect of it was wet.”
Mrs. Burger Boy
It wasn’t all a failure though, at least from my point of view. It was the right size and composition for the type of burger you want when you just want a burger in a place that doesn’t suck too much. Throw down a few of The Cavalier’s signature frozen drinks, and I’m sure you’d forget how the burger hurt you without much much effort.
Suitable. 5/10
